Project Runway Season 14, Episode 7: Dumpster Diving

 Greetings, Project Runway Fans!

I think the Project Runway Graphic Art division had the most fun with this episode.

So did the props crew.

With a tip of the (freecycled) Project Runway cap to Season 10's Fabio Costa, this year,  the unconventional materials challenge featured cast-off, vintage technology.

All those tubes and wires...

The Challenge

"Designers, you may have thought that we already did the unconventional materials challenge, but you'd be wrong. That was the 'special sponsor promotion' challenge. THIS is the unconventional materials challenge.

????

"The woman with the perfect posture standing next to me is Nina's boss, Anne Fulenwider, from Marie Claire. Despite her presence, this will not be a chance for your garment to appear in Marie Claire. We've done that twice this season. How much more must we do for you?"

Gratuitous shot of actual dumpster diving.

Project Runway over the years has had it's iconic moments. Santino mimicking Tim Gunn....Christian Siriano demonstrating the perfect runway walk, Laura Bennett and the turtle poop....To this list we can add the shopping cart parade. I even have a soundtrack for it. Turn it up...LET'S GO...

I'm doin' the shopping cart...I need this I need that...

Doin' the shopping cart...gimme this, gimme that....

I spread my feet apart and I bring the shopping cart....

Being New York City, I'm sure nobody batted an eyelash at the spectacle. Because THEY DO THIS EVERY YEAR IN THE WINTER.

Friends, let me introduce you to the NYC IDIOTAROD!

Yes, New Yorkers are cooler than you. In fact, they're down right freezing.

For the past ten years, about the same time as the Iditarod in Alaska, New Yorkers take to Queens and Manhattan in souped up shopping carts (some with real soup...it's cold out there!) and race across town. It's almost as crazy as a Project Runway unconventional materials challenge.

We're seven episodes in. In production time, its somewhere around a couple of weeks. At this point, some of life's hard truths are starting to sink in.

"I've got to change my 'mumsy' ways."

"Must use found materials...no muslin."

That is, for SOME PEOPLE.  Others...

"You see, Cahn-dees, I have a see-cret strategee. I will make safe garments...nothing too good, nothing too bad...Every week I will be safe and that's how I will get to Fashion Week."

"You see, Lind-see, I can sew faster than you so I cahn vait until the last minute to make my skirt. Until then, I will distract you from making yours, because you are so slow!"

One thing I was pleased to see this week....

Shop safety is always very important.

For a change, no one had to be rushed to the hospital.

Guest Judges

I'm going to tread delicately here. I've been accused in the past of being too critical of guest judges, particularly when they seemed so out of left field. Paula Patton was this week's guest judge. She's on every other television show and in all the popular movies. She was recently chosen to do a fashion spread for Ellen Tracy. So there's that.

"I'm just trying to keep it positive! Everyone tried their very best. Even the ones that utterly failed!" 

Such sweetness, light and generosity of spirit. Makes you wonder what Robin Thicke did to cause the divorce, right? Because you know it was his fault. He knows it was his fault.

Not many women get a mediocre album written about their starter marriage.

That was kind of petty, wasn't it? Listen, you give me guest judges who add nothing substantive to the mix but good posture, Nina's continued employment (you're not fooling us, Anne) and a 1,000 watt smile (seriously, Robin...what were you thinking?) I'm going to poke fun.

Let's move on to the outfits.

Laurie (Mouse Pad) Underwood

Perhaps the model walked too fast for the judges to get a good look at it. Perhaps the other dreadful outfits wore them down to a more charitable disposition. This was one of my least favorite things she did. In fact, it's my least favorite look of the night. (Yes, worse than the loser.) Even with a little paint slapped on here and there, it's a mouse pad dress.

By the way...when did mouse pads become "vintage technology"? I'm using one right now.

Candice Cuoco

Everyone raves and raves about Candice....I'm just not seeing it right now.

The dress is staring back at us in silent judgment.

This was a hot glue gun hot mess. Wires weren't fully glued on. They began to unstick and pop out in odd places. And then, there's the matter of the "eyelids." That is not a sophisticated white accent. It's not even a clever or compelling graphic statement.

Some in the chatroom began comparing this dress to Jillian's Twizzler dress in Season 4. Really?

I wasn't a big fan of that dress, but at least it's not staring back at me.

Merline "Birdie" Labissiere

Then this ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling,

By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore,

“Though thy wires be tacked and tethered, thou,” I said, “art sure not feathered,

Ghastly grim and ancient Raven wandering from the East River shore—

Tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night’s fierce Runway shore!”

            Quoth the Raven “Nevermore.”

Merline was safe, although those teal panties are playing peek-a-boo!

Edmond "Fringe Benefits" Newton

This one looked better the further away from it you were. In close-ups, you could see the glue. Edmond took a close look at his matierals and realized that the underside of the keyboard keys was shiny and had an interesting texture. He assumed (correctly) that others would use the right side of the key. Black on black, the right side wasn't as interesting as the reverse. Instead of covering the whole dress, he used it to make a pattern. Smart use of materials.  Once again, however, the model's hair is in the way of the most interesting part of the dress.

This wasn't one of my favorite looks. The front looked better than the back. The only real interest is in the strapping. The back of the skirt is an afterthought and the fringe thing, from the back, looks like a set of hockey shoulder pads.

Swapnil "The Guru of Goofing Off" Shinde

It's all very interesting, isn't it? Up close, however, the wires were tied together with duct tape, sticking out all over the place...no rhyme or reason. He basically tied a nest of wires onto a muslin skirt.

"I'm pretty sure that looks like something I saw on 'This Old House'."

"I could have sworn this was the 'Angie's List' Challenge!"

Let's set aside all the shenanigans associated with Swapnil's multiple smoke breaks, strategy of mediocrity, and holding back. My theory is that he thought that an avant garde gimmick would get him by. Remember, he went for the "wow" factor in the last challenge knowing full well his look would not be easily mass produced--the whole point of the challenge. The junkyard challenge might not have been the best time to employ that approach. Let's hope for Swapnil's sake that there isn't a real avant garde challenge in his future. He may have shot his wad on this.

Lindsey "Indecisive" Creel

Throughout this competition, Lindsey has been unsure of her designs, her textiles, her approaches, etc... Even when she is sure, she's easily tripped up by a setback.  She made a beautiful bodice covered with keyboard keys....however...it came dangerously close to just being keys glued onto muslin--keys as decoration, not keys used as a textile substitute. The difference is subtle. She clearly ran out of time and material and turned to the CD dust sleeves to make the skirt. An obvious choice, but way too much like a textile. I actually liked the effect of the skirt. BUT....the skirt and bodice don't seem to go together.  And the little silver belt and doodad at the neckline don't really help, either.

"It's like the bathroom tile on top and the shower curtain on the bottom."

Zac took his harsh pills for this challenge.

Joseph Charles "Mumsy" Poli

It's the worst thing he's ever made. Up until now, his designs and workmanship have been unimpeachable. They've also been uninspired. Too safe. Too conventional. Too...matronly (because lord knows, old women are conventional and safe....) Now, if I had to pick between the two mousepad dresses, I'd choose Joseph's. Sorry, Laurie. I have to say it was the least matronly thing he made. Why the auf? Well, for one thing, he barely manipulated the pads at all. For another, there hasn't been a challenge he's really come out ahead on, let alone won.

"You know, I had some encouraging words from Paula...a kiss from Heidi....that's more than Robin Thicke got this year."

So true.

Ashley "Flare Skirt" Tipton

Ashley had Polaroid pictures.

Break

Shake

Make!

The smeared color developing chemicals made a lovely effect. So she gathered them all together and made a lovely print dress.

"It's like a dress made of memories."

It's gorgeous. Almost got her the win. It was easily my favorite look of the night.  It was a beautifully executed look for this challenge. 

Is the lack of confidence an act for for real?  If it's an act...well done. Way to promote that story line. If it's for real, it's understandable, but she wouldn't be the first designer or the only designer driven by her need for acceptance. I suspect many of them are filled with self doubt. It compels them to be successful.

Kelly "From the Deli" Dempsey

She took aluminum tubing, stretched it out and sewed (or glued...) it in alternate layers to make an interesting textured pattern.

Kelly's "street" aesthetic finally fit the challenge perfectly. The dress was loose on the model, so at the last minute, she added the back and side straps. Brilliant fix, which totally fixed the fit.

Well deserved win!

Jake

It seems that every season, the outside world breaks through to remind the designers that there is more to life than competition and personal ambitions. Jake learned that his dog would need to be put down and decided to leave the competition so that he could be by his side at the end. Sure, Jake could have continued. But this was the dog that was with him when his parents died. It speaks to his character that things like loyalty and companionship are important to him.

Wasn't it fortunate, in hindsight, that Jake included his dog in his audition videos? 

Until next week...see you in the Blogging Project Runway chat room!

Project Runway, Season 14 Episode 6: Heidi Whities

Greetings, Project Runway Fans!

Heidi is a mistress of marketing. You may have seen her Wix.com commercial...a rather brilliant pitch within a pitch.

"I'm thinking of 'Heidi's Whities!'"

At the same time she was promoting a fictitious mens' underwear website for Wix.com, she was launching her own lingerie line. Heidi Klum is a promotional ninja.

The Challenge

This week, our designers became Heidi's minions as she paraded them out in front of her lingerie line.

The challenge this week was to make a bra and pantie set for Heidi's Intimates line.

They were given bra forms to use...mostly for the dignity of their models, I think. Although that didn't turn out as well as the producers would have hoped. The instructions were to use the bra as an example of what to make. Copy the bra form but don't put stuff on top of it and use it as a base.

Let's just say right now that these models are good sports. These designers didn't make anyone look that good.

Once again this week, no trip to Mood. Instead, the designers pawed through lace on the work table.

"Heidi, I must say that I admire your audacity."
"That's a compliment, right Tim?"

There was a twist.  Tim and Heidi, wearing pajamas, took the designers to the runway, which was all decked out in sleeping gear and covered in pajamas. They were sleeping in the studio over night.

Worst. Slumber. Party. Ever.

Heidi delivered the twist. "Make a sexy cover-up." It turned out to be just a twist as no contestant was really judged on the cover-up. 

The Judges

Could Zac Posen get any creeper? This week, the creep factor went off the charts.  From his "Let's get intimate!" declaration as Tim came out with the models, to his overt grabbiness.

Can't you keep your hands to yourself for once???

We were even treated to his tribute to Game of Thrones after Nina made a strange reference to show in a comment.

"I am Khaleesi!"

Oh, Zac....

I hate to be such a fuddy duddy, but I can't keep up with the starlets anymore. Who knew it would become so hard?  I mean, I know I'm old, but I have a tween and a teen and you'd think I'd be up on all the pop culture.

This week's guest judge was Annabella Avery "Bella" Thorne.  She's a Disney Channel actress, has a single out, and hung out at New York Fashion Week with her BFF, Julia Goldani.

Is any of this making sense to you?  Because I know who should have been a guest judge this week....

Don't get me wrong... Bella Thorne was an excellent judge. She knows her lingerie and even figured out how to fix Merline's look.

"Does anyone have a needle and thread so I can stitch this down?"

But Trump....he has experience in the field, an eye for quality and his own fashion collection. He's quick and decisive with the ratings. He recently declared that Heidi Klum was "sadly, no longer a '10.'" This episode was filmed way before his campaign went into full gear and his feud with Heidi erupted. What would this episode been like had he been a judge?

That's right. More exciting. Big, successful, highest ratings ever.

So here's my judge line-up this week....

Strong, successful, winning line-up. 

Candice Cuoco

Candice loves lingerie and clearly loves straps. She made an interesting garter overlay on top of the panties. Cover-up looked ok. It was a solid safe.

"Safe? This judging is cuckoo. I would have picked that for the win. It's a successful design and it would sell a lot. Well, I could sell a lot of it. Maybe Heidi, who sadly, is no longer a '10' couldn't sell it...."

Candice sews well. That's for sure. It's a good looking outfit but this is a DESIGN challenge. There is nothing new about this outfit. It is a classic, lingerie look.

Edmond Newton

Sadly, this was safe. I would have loved to have seen Nina go after that beige stripe of lace in the crotch.

"It looks like a bandage."

Ashley Nell Tipton

Bella wanted to see a little less fabric in the front of the panty. and I have to say that given the back....

"Must....resist....touching....panty...."

Bella has a point about the front. 

Lindsey Creel

At this point, the tosselled, bedroom hair is starting to bore me.  On this model neither the hair nor makeup are doing her any favors. I'm noticing the styling more the outfit. The pants are ok. The bra is ok. It's all ok. Nothing that Heidi doesn't already have somewhere in her line up. Lovely color choice.

Kelly Dempsey

Sometimes, when Heidi says "show me your point of view" she doesn't really mean it. And in Kelly's case, she doesn't really mean it. She had no intention of putting such a sporty look into her collection. That's a shame. This ensemble looked really comfortable and versatile.  This was my favorite cover-up. She sort of looked like a prize fighter.

Laurie Underwood

Never mind that the cover up makes the model look like the Bride of Dracula...those panties would require a full Brazilian wax. And although you can't see it here, Laurie committed the original sin of putting a middle seam on the front of a pantie.

I see that Lifetime got smart and required the models to wear a liner to cover private parts.

Swapnil Shinde

Oh, he said it best when he said that all those straps turned this into a fashion statement instead of an addition to a line of lingerie in mass production.

"This is why China is killing India in business right now. Too many straps. If you had gone to a good business school, like I did, you'd know that too many straps is a bad design."

Nina and Zac went on and on about Khaleesi. I'm not a Game of Thrones watcher, but what little I know of Khaleesi and her two dragons, that isn't the vibe I got from this outfit at all.  Instead, the model looks like some sort of SBDM Superhero. 

Charles Joseph Poli

CJP has managed to send out a conventional look each week and still emerge solidly safe. Is he capable of pushing a design envelope?

"What does that even mean? Can't something be classic anymore? Does everything have to be 'weird' and 'strange'?"

Merline Labissiere

Ok...so this won. I'm still in a bit of shock over this. Even after fawning over Ashley's outfit and Bella's repair job, I thought this one was going to just miss the win.

I'm not really sure how comfortable all those straps are. I would be tugging at them constantly. 

I just note two things.  In production, the bra is hiked up a bit more, just as Bella suggested (does she get a piece of this action?) and a set of inner straps are added.  For all the hew and cry over Laurie's middle seam, note what's on this panty......

"It's a cuckoo design. Wouldn't you get tangled up in those straps? Heidi probably outsources the production to China."

Jake Wall

Heidi warned you not to just put stuff on top of the bra form.

And yes, you did multiple straps, but you put them in places where no one wants to see them...like the hip area.

Also, again, for a design that depends so much on looking at straps....move your model's hair!

Uninspired.

Blake Patterson

Alas, poor Blake....

You were doomed from the start.

This model doesn't have an ounce of body fat on her. She can probably hold a plank for 25 minutes. But the only thing we'll remember about her is how much she flopped around in this bra top.

Shameful.

Here's the thing...and Bella tried to make this point... underwires lift up the breast. And that's it. They don't support it or hold it in place. If you don't provide something to support them, they will flop around. Blake needed to do more than just stretch lace fabric across the cups. He needed to attach them higher to the strap.  The "cover up" was silly.

"Blake,you're FIRED!"

All the designers still standing should have been showing at New York Fashion Week this week. Unless Lifetime no longer cares...and since the runway is completely anonymous, maybe they don't! That means Blake was out and didn't get to go. Six designers showed this week. So what this tell me is that if you are not a finalist, Fashion Week is just extra work for you with no promotion whatsoever.

I'm glad I'm done here. I hate writing about lingerie. It may look pretty, but in reality, the lace is itchy and uncomfortable. This stuff is not meant for long distances or vigorous activity. How can you be comfortable in your own skin when what you are wearing makes you want to crawl out of it?

By the way, I'd be remiss if I didn't link to Heidi's brilliant response to Donald Trump.

Next week we finally get to go back to Mood! have another unconventional material challenge.

Until then, thanks for visiting and pop on by to our weekly group therapy session on Blogging Project Runway, live at 9 pm on Thursday.