It begins to wear on them after a while.
You think it's bad now, Sonjia....when this show airs, it will compete with Mitt Romney's acceptance speech at the Republican National Convention. So while Republican Presidential Candidate, Mitt Romney endeavored to reach out to women and the nation with his message, the women of Project Runway were having dramas of their own this week.
|"I love you WOMEN!"|
This week's challenge was brought to us by Project Runway's accessory wall sponsor, Lord & Taylor, and honored Project Runway's 10
|"We have an outfit designed by one designer from each of the previous seasons of Project Runway. One season is missing. Yours!"|
|"This is Capitalism at its finest. We're going to let the market forces decide the winner and loser this week--the way it should be in a free society."|
Fabio had immunity this week, but didn't design like it. His entry was thoughtful on design but very simple to produce, with an eye toward the sort of versatility a woman would want in a $200 dress.
It was very nice. With a jacket, it was very versatile. It was EXACTLY WHAT YOU WOULD FIND IN A DEPARTMENT STORE, so he was safe.
Speaking of immunity, Melissa was not immune to the collective despair this week.
|"If I don't make some sort of dress in this horrible synthetic fabric, it's auf wiedersehen for me!"|
|"The choloroflourocarbin gasses from the synthetic polyester are aggravating my manic depression!"|
|"Remember the hope and optimism you felt about Project Runway when you first heard you were chosen? Don't you think there's something wrong when you haven't felt that good about it since you've been on the show?"|
Mitt's got a point. Being in the competition is a lot more challenging than thinking about being in the competition. Somehow, Melissa either found some inner competitive fortitude or perhaps she just cycled through her depression to her manic state.
She produced an asymmetrical hemmed cocktail dress with a gravity defying front. Michael Kors loved how the front framed the face. It was SOMETHING A BIT TOO UNIQUE FOR A DEPARTMENT STORE, so she didn't win.
one-way monkey one trick pony was back.
|"An origami rose is just what the Lord & Taylor collection needs."|
|"It's like that movie, Alien. You almost expect an alien to come crawling out from between the folds..."|
|"Mitt gave me a hand-folded origami heart for Valentine's Day when we were first married. He handed it to me while we ate tuna noodle casserole over the ironing board in our basement apartment."|
Seriously, do you think Bonnie Brooks even considered for one moment producing a garment with complicated origami folds? Think of the third world labor that would have to go into that?
Dmitry was safe this week......wait.....safe?
Elena was having a crisis of confidence this week. She loves producing one-of-a-kind garments with detail, drama and exoskeletons. She really struggled this week trying to produce something true to her vision but commercial enough for Lord & Taylor.
The judges loved it! Woo hoo! She took the breastplate from her armor and softened it up in the front and back, so that it produced a cinching effect. The unique strapping allowed the model to show off her tattoo. Thus, Elena was able to avoid all the drama that plagued the women this week....
|Well, maybe not.|
|"This is why I don't shop at Lord & Taylor."|
It was just too much for Sonjia this week. She struggled with the fabric, the design and getting it ready for the model.
Then she struggled to get it on the model.
|Sew and cry...|
|"The beauty of these space-age, petrochemical, miracle fabrics is that they don't fray if they're not properly hemmed. It looks good enough. Go out and fake it on the runway."|
What was all the fuss about? She was safe.
|"America is at its greatest when there are no restrictions on our entrepreneurial spirit."|
|"I know you're really talking about taxes, but I find it inspiring for my aesthetic vision. Let nothing stand in the way of my stripped chiffon. It's what I do."|
Chris immediately saw that there were more dresses than gowns and decided that a gown would be a better choice for the 10th outfit. He set about ripping some pink chiffon into strips and sewing them together to make a top. With an....interesting back, to say the very least.
Coupled with a sister-wife skirt, the look is sophisticated enough for Lord & Taylor. Right Bonnie?
|"Hundreds of women would buy that."|
|"You're kidding me. That's the winner? Do you expect a woman to walk into Lord & Taylor looking for a ripped up, synthetic dress with a keyhole back? Not even Sarah Palin on her worst day would do that."|
Gunnar and Alicia
Why bother to go into details here.
Alicia attempted to make a Chanel dress, circa 1928 and Gunnar thought the collection needed another lacy, heavily sequined dress. I'd go into more detail about why neither of these were even remotely worthy of being considered for sale at Lord & Taylor, but neither one of them went home.
|"What the hell?"|
|"They clearly met the brief."|
|"For me, Project Runway is all about the empty chair at the end of the show...the designer who Tim has to send back to the workroom to pack up their things. It's my favorite part"|
|"Listen. We've become a nation that values love over respect. We've grown soft and weak. You can't truly appreciate the thrill of victory without the risk of utter and total defeat. When everyone wins, no one wins."|
Yeah, you tell 'em, Gov. Christie.
I can't believe I wasted blog space on nine mediocre, polyester dresses. Seriously. Next week, we have another team challenge: three teams of three designers each and Ven is back in the hot seat.
Also, this means that unless they knock off two or maybe even three designers, the Project Runway Fashion Week show will have eight designers showing.
Unless they keep them all AGAIN next week, in which case, I will start talking to empty chairs.
See you then!