Project Runway, Season 14: Finale Part 2: Four on the Floor

Greetings, Project Runway Fans!

Well, this is it!

It's SHOWTIME!

I could cut straight to the chase and give you the runway shows, but then, we'd miss out on the great mysteries of life that form the context of the runway shows to come. Without them, we cannot fully understand the outcome.

Or something like that.

First mystery....what the hell happened to Tim Gunn?

"Here's the glitter I bought for you!"

And if that wasn't enough....

"I wish I could join you in glittering all the things!"

What was in the Milanese sandwich he got at Bob's? Perhaps the vapors from the spray adhesive started getting to him.

Then, there's this.

"Here's the print fabric that I purchased for you, Ashley."

Where? What did it look like? Why didn't she use it? 

Here's my theory. It was an elaborate prank by Tim Gunn. He bought a yard of every ugly print she ever used and left a note at the bottom of it that said:

Dear Ashley,

The prints you chose this season were ugly. Don't listen to the judges. They're crazy.

Regards,

 Tim

"I'm bringing sexy back."

For Edmond, it became a battle with the ruffles. To him, a runway show has always meant big, audacious dresses with tons of volume and fabric. But the judges responded most to his sexy, spare, body-conscious dresses.  At his studio visit five weeks in, Tim told him to concentrate on evening wear. Two days before the show, the judges told him to concentrate on the sexy. They give you seven weeks to put together a spectacular show. If, at the end of the seven, you miss the mark, the finale becomes yet another, impossible, time crunched challenge.

But the most heartbreaking of all was losing all the drama and amazement of what could have been Candice Cuoco's show.

So long big waist pannier thingy.

Good bye, dress cage.

Auf Wiedersehen to any passion or excitement that Candice's could have had.

At this point in the show it's clearly down to Ashley vs. Kelly.

Would it be the woman who sewed every garment up until the last minute of the runway?

Or would it be the woman who glittered everything in sight, including the models?

On with the show...

Wearing patriotic red, white, and blue for September 11, 2015...

Edmond Newton

The show started strong and bold with one of the best fitting dresses he ever made in competition.

This should have been a refreshing pop of color. Instead, it was a bewildering, floppy, sloppy, puckery dress.

Where have we seen this before?

Remember, Blake won a challenge with this dress!!!

OK, not exactly, but whatever possessed Edmond to attempt a balloon dress, particularly one with three tiers? 

I think it looks like a gathered Hefty bag. It was Heidi's favorite dress. Really? I'd love to see her wear it.

 Nina said she loved this one. I don't believe her for a minute. Carrie Underwood was probably giving her serious side eye every time she made a critical comment.

 No. Tell me this was one of the dresses he spit out in one day. I'd hate to think he spent more than one day on it.

Despite the withering critique from the judges about ruffles and flourishes, he kept this piece in. It is one of the strongest and it broke up the body conscious silhouette without sacrificing any sophistication.

Not a bad take on the high-low dress trend. The standard practice is to make the neck high if the hem is high and plunge the back where the hem goes to the floor. The back needed something more interesting.  The front strapping was a bit messy. 

Edmond's bright blue, avant garde-challenge, Muppet jacket made a comeback in black! The open back shows some design interest. I would have loved to see it in color, paired with a simple, black or white sheath. That would have added some much needed color as well as the feeling of layering color and texture.

The print is uninspiring, likely a holdover from his collection of daywear and separates he originally considered showing.

This next piece out-right defied the judges admonition to lose the ruffles. Zac, especially, sees these sorts of embellishments as attention-getting gimmicks. A good designer shouldn't have to resort to show-stopping schlock. 

But the biggest sin here is that the ruffles actually detract from the garment. They add unflattering bulk to the model's chest, stomach and hips. The trails at the end look mangled. This either needed to be even bigger or needed to be toned down in the bodice and through the midsection.

This is a more successful design in that he doesn't sacrifice the sexiness and fit for the ruffles. Had this been the only ruffled dress, he would have been fine. But with two, the judges could pick apart both. I'm not sure why he gave it a train. It also bustles unnecessarily in the back. 

The judges knew that Edmond was capable of beautiful fit and design. His idea of high fashion = fancy ruffles flew in the face of their desire to see some real design work. And with a  show that featured a few forgettable dresses, we knew that Edmond fell short. Now that he's been on the show, perhaps he'll have the confidence to design dresses that don't require all the gimmicky embellishments.

Candice Cuoco

I count eight different fabrics in this collection. And that's a problem.

The cherry blossom fabric made a triumphant return in the form of a simple, elegant dress. It was one of the most beautiful, soulful dresses that Candice made this season. The stuff of dreams is this dress, which looked as if it wandered in from someone else's show....

...as the next look catapulted us into Tackyville. Who is this woman and why would she wear this outfit when she also has that dress that just walked?  What's with the cropped bustier? Other than to show the world you can defy gravity, what purpose does it serve? Styling the pants with those shoes made it look like the pants had cuffs.

 Black leather, lace-up dress. Not bad looking, just not very innovative.

 The styling on the model screams "west coast stoner chick" to me. Completely uninspiring.

If I'm not mistaken, this is now the third time we've seen the jacket with a sleeve that is not completely sewn together. You can see the hems of the open seams are finished. When did these "cape sleeves" become a thing? I don't like them. I want real sleeves! 

Other than that, this outfit could have used a pop of color in the bodice. (Didn't she make a bustier in the red, embossed leather?) The styling made it look like the model walked in from another show.

 This looks like one of the looks she churned out this week to replace some of the more exuberant outfits she had planned to show. It's a throw-away.

 Because everyone wants a flowy dress in leather, right?  Only I think we'd want a better fit in the bodice.

It's not a bad dress. In a better show, you would have seen the build up to the finish. She said that one of her inspirations was the "China Through the Looking Glass" show at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. I'm not seeing any Asian inspiration.

 Aside from the skirt that Candice wore to introduce the show, which was a re-visit of one of her competition designs, this was clearly another throw-back piece. This is what the avant garde challenge should have looked like, had Candice had more time and better materials.I would have liked to have seen her go even wider with the arches at the bottom.

This dress needed something more than what she gave it at the end. The hem was uneven at the bottom. I would have used the dress cage, just put a hack-saw to it and cut it down a bit. Or asked Tim run to Mood for some metal hoops. This needed some volume at the bottom to show off the gorgeous pattern and give it some interest.

In the end, I don't think the "McQueen-like" dresses sank her at all. Her show suffered from too many ideas that she desperately needed to edit.  She wisely took out the pannier and hat--both interesting ideas, but not if you're only going to use them once and so overwhelmingly. She should have gone a step further and edited down the fabrics as well.

The show also had no transition. It went from 0-60-180 mph, hurking and jerking along the way. She started off sweet then abruptly went edgy and finished with drama. It was like three different shows.

And finally, she repeated too many elements. Did the show need three cropped bustiers? Did it need two takes on a black, leather dress or two "mermaid" gowns? Candice has the skills. She just needs the focus.

Kelly Dempsey

Studio 54 for the hip hop generation.

Kelly already knew that the judges didn't think the looks she chose were anything special. So she needed to choose the best stuff she had, mix and match everything just right and pull out all the stops on the styling. Hair amped, lipstick and shoes glittered, her posse was ready to walk.

This was a strong opening. The pants fit beautifully. The legs flared out gracefully without being too overwhelming. The "bib" top was a fun pop of color and shine.

 I liked this look a lot as well. The bandeau stripe was fun and flirty. I liked the shiny fabric paired with the leather from the bridge dress.

 this is where the collection started to lose me. Kelly had two repeating motifs. This "corrugated metal" fabric print was one of them. I'm not keen on the trend of using the fancy fabric on one side and a plain fabric on the other. It seems like manufacturers just want to cut back on using premium fabrics to satisfy a profit margin. The tight band around the thighs seems like a gratuitous attempt to emphasize the butt. It also makes it difficult to walk.

 The shiny fabric returns again, paired with a cropped top made from the bridge leather. It's ok in a youthful, unsophisticated way.  and I know the model is leaning to one side but that skirt hem really seemed crooked.

Another garment with the fancy fabric on one side. This one is a top that's longer in front than in the back. The pants combine the two motif fabrics she's using: the corrugated metal print with the wood grain print. The fit on the pants is way too tight.

Also, if you're going to do interesting straps in the back, why cover them up with the model's hair?

This look features her wood grain motif fabric along with netting. Kelly is strongest when she is being whimsical. The whole long dress as short skirt is a clever way to combine two current trends. The wood grain fabric amps up the whimsy as does the matching fanny pack. This is one outfit where the fanny pack works as an accessory.

Nina called this the "skating outfit." My commentary last week is still valid. I don't understand why she felt the need to cut up expensive fabric and combine it with trim to make a new textile. That aside, this is another dress with the banding around the top of the thigh. The result in the back is just a little too vulgar, in my opinion. It's another dress with the fancy fabric in the front. Even though she's using motif fabric in the back, my same position stands. It seems cheap and throw-away just to do the luxe fabric in the front regardless of what other designers are putting out.

The bodice needed better fitting. Shiny fabric just makes that painfully obvious. 

Throughout the last two episodes, I believe she showed the top part of this outfit to Tim Gunn about five times. The top is pieced together with gold and silver metallic trim. Up close, it's a little bit of a mess. No problem here because no one is looking at this garment up close. It was her showstopping final piece and it did as advertised.

This shot is a little too dark, which is a shame because Carrie Underwood is visibly drooling.

And if you have to storm out of a post-modern discotheque, you might as well look fierce doing so.

I thought Tim did her a major disservice trying to talk her out of using the mesh. I thought the mesh pieces were her strongest and smartest. I like her take on positive and negative space--exposure and covering up. 

Using light colored fabrics meant there was no room for error on the fit of the pants. Unfortunately, a few of the garments were so tight that nothing was left to the imagination underneath.

Kelly has a lot of potential, not all of which was showcased effectively in this final runway show. On her own time and her own terms, I think we're going to see amazing things. I'm pretty sure there's going to be a "help wanted" sign at Bob's to go with the "As Seen on Project Runway" and "Former Home of Kelly Dempsey" sign.

What should the Kelly Dempsey sandwich contain? I'm sure Bob is working on one right now.

Ashley Nell Tipton

Dangerous curves ahead.

The show started strong with a two-toned, body conscious sheath paired with a lacy top. The pops of color are fun and the looks is feminine, yet sophisticated. The lace is completely on trend. The hem could have stood to be taken up just an inch.

This was a breathtaking way to address the latest sheer panel trend for a fuller figured woman or even an older woman who wants to be fashionable but not vulgar. The design basics that we've come to expect from Ashley are there but the fabric choices are smart and refreshing. A little bit of fringe and the patterned mesh just add to the beauty of the piece.

Unfortunately, some of Ashley's models were not the strongest runway walkers. This model should have given them all lessons. She twirled that skirt to within an inch of its life. That twirl was everything.  I'm still not a fan of the quilted fabric for this look. It's not as delicate as the look before it and as you can see, the skirt had a tendency to roll below the belly in the front and bunch up over the butt in the back. On a  more positive note, Ashley fixed the problem with the fit in the bodice, so our model can twirl away with abandon and maintain her dignity up top.

Ashley listened to Nina's advice and used the flower halos sporadically. Here, we have a simple tunic, so the elaborate head piece wouldn't compete with it. I'm not fond of this look, myself. It would be cute with leggings. Only a women with legs that look as good as this model's could wear this dress. The color reminds me of a hospital gown.

I totally dig the idea of this outfit but the fit is still problematic  The bodice bunches up in the front and along the sides. The pants are fitted too tightly in front. But other designers had the same fit problems with their more conventional models. Ashley's degree of difficulty was exponentially higher.

This outfit is a clever take on the peek-a-boo sheer garments we see on runways everywhere, all the time. The halter and panty underneath are absolutely perfect. The bottom of the hem is so interesting that your eye doesn't land on the crotch as it would with some of these sheers. 

This is another garment that I like the idea of and wish the execution were just a little better. The front of the shorts pouches out and the legs are riding up in the middle. I put shorts back on the rack when they do that to me. This reminds me that i wanted to see more jackets in this collection. I'm glad she featured them. 

I'm a little ambivalent about this outfit. The idea of a long overblouse is a good one, but I'm not sure I like the color combination. The  fringe hits the model at a weird spot. From the back, it looks a little like a night gown. I think I would have preferred the long overblouse in the white sheer fabric, instead. The pants fit well. 

The aubergine gown made a triumphant comeback, this time with matching undergarments. The effect was spectacular, for the most part. I think the panty could have been a touch lower in the back.

For the flowery finale, Ashley left off the headpiece. This has an "Infant of Prague" look to it. The flowers are very evocative of Mexico City. Unfortunately, she admitted to gluing the flowers on. Others have observed that it would have been next to no trouble sewing the flowers on and the garment would have had more permanence. The halter top is beautifully fitted. The effect adds volume and drama without adding bulk.

Should Ashley have won? I ask you this, which other collection offered up as high a level of construction and design consistency? Which other collection reflected a personal inspiration as successfully? Which other collection solved a design problem?

This season, the most technically proficient designers were sunk by their lack of cohesion. One moment they go sexy and another moment they go dramatic with no place in between. Designers relied on too many gimmicks: fancy fabrics, embellishments, prints, beading...

Ashley took garments that would be hard for some "model-size" women to wear and made them work on larger models. She proved her hypothesis that you can push the design envelope for a wider variety of sizes. Were the fittings perfect? No. But no finalist flawlessly fit their models.

In many ways, as others have observed, once Swapnil left the scene, this season was Ashley's to lose. She didn't. The judges and producers didn't need to steer things her way. You could see it in the drawing that they showed during Tim's visit. She had a strong vision of what she wanted to see and she accomplished it. She compromised where it made sense and where it didn't, she stuck to her guns. Her last moments were spent fitting models--and rightfully so. She didn't need extra glitter or another tweak to a garment. 

Is she the best designer?

You can win the competition and end up not being the most successful designer. You can win and not be the best designer (as we have seen in past seasons.) I don't think this season is as glaring an example of that as a couple of the past seasons have been. Ashley is technically very, very good. She is capable of pulling out some incredible stops once given the time and materials. She played Project Runway very strategically through he competitions. However, when it came to the final show, she went for broke. This win is well deserved, in my opinion.

And another season of Project Runway comes to an end. Thanks for taking the journey with me. Join us on Thursday in the Blogging Project Runway chatroom as we relieve the drama of this past season with the reunion. And join me as I blog Project Runway JR starting in a couple of weeks.

Project Runway Season 14 Finale Part one: No Mas Pantalones.

Greetings Project Runway Fans!

We're in the home stretch.

When last we left the designers...

Poor Edmond was convinced he was out. Then, in what was one of the WORST KEPT SECRETS IN PROJECT RUNWAY HISTORY...

Tim saves him. Yay!

If you watch any of the preview videos on Lifetime, you could have figured this out. This week's video was entitled "Almost Eliminated." Yes, my dear viewers, that feeling you feel is the feeling of being snookered. That trick was so cheap, Fabio Costa could have dumpster dived for it.

The next to last episode always features Tim visiting the designers in their homes. Four finalists meant that Tim had to go to four cities. These visits are always a highlight of every season. This year, the producers teased that this show, at 120 minutes, would be the longest show in Project Runway history!!!! And for all that, we only got about 30 minutes worth of home visits. What a rip off! 

Well, this blog doesn't have to follow the editors decisions. I think we should revisit the visits. In excruciating detail. Because, they're the best part of the penultimate show.

I visited San Diego once. It was so impossibly beautiful, I had a hard time returning home.

Ashley showed her collection to Tim, Her inspiration was Mexico City in the 1950's, which reflected her family's heritage. It would also feature a variety of styles for her plus-sized models in the form of separates and single garments.

1950's Mexico City would have been an odd juxtaposition of cosmopolitan, post-war outfits and the folk styles of the Mestizos--the mixed Spanish and indigenous people. One of these styles is the hair crown or fiesta halo. These are usually bright colored paper flowers woven into braided hair. Here, Ashley created delicate silk flower crowns designed to match and compliment the single hued dresses she was making. The whole effect would be like Frida Kahlo, only more muted and subdued.

Tim was almost concerned about how matronly flowers and traditional dresses would look and realized that's exactly what Ashley intended.

She hand dyed all of her fabrics. Most pieces appeared to be a combination of lace and another solid fabric. Prints were used sparingly. After the visit, it was time for dinner with the family.

I could have watched 15 minutes of Tim making tortillas with Ashley's mama!

Out of all four family meets, this one had the best food, hands down. I looked at that spread and wanted to reach through the TV and grab a tortilla, some fillings and all the salsas. And go for seconds.

And listen to Mr. Tipton go on and on about what he was going to do when he visited New York City for the first time.

"I want to run around Central Park naked."

Listen, Pops, you wouldn't be the first person to do that. And quite frankly, as long as you don't smoke (yes, Central Park is now a no smoking zone!) I don't think the cops would arrest you. I hope Ashley's mom and dad enjoyed their visit immensely. I can only imagine Tim giving them a laundry list of things to see and do while they were there. Ashley is also very lucky to still have her abuelita (grandmother.) Sometimes, it's the grandma who sees the talents and interests that the parents sometimes miss.

This woman is Ashley's biggest fan. I'm pretty sure, even though she didn't say it, that this entire collection is inspired by her grandma as a young woman.  

Tim proceeded to San Francisco to visit Candice Cuoco.

Where everyone wears coats to the beach....

"Mom, I hope you don't mind, but I brought up your drug addiction a bunch of times on the show. The whole nation knows about it now."

Actually, I found this visit rather comforting in that Dale Cuoco is rather frank about her past addictions and how hard Candice's childhood was. She is so proud of what Candice has been able to accomplish, not just on the runway, but in her personal life. She's raising two beautiful kids, who also joined the beachside coffee klatch with Tim.

"I thought I would be overdressed!"

No Tim. Despite what you may have heard, everybody bundles up when they go to the beach.

But Candice's son stole the show.

HOW CUTE IS THAT KID???

After the fog lifted, it was time for a trip into town to visit Candice's studio. They were greeted by a large cage skirt understructure for the final look.

Inside, there were all sorts of wooden hats and waist pieces along with a variety of rich textiles. She stayed behind after the show and saw the Metropolitan Art Museum exhibit "China Through the Looking Glass." This exhibit was also the theme of the Met Ball this year. So she showed Tim the embossed leather, laser cut leather, sequined net overlay, thick satin, thin satin. It was a fabric explosion.

We also found out that Tim could use some upper body training.

"I can't even lift this with one hand!"

"It's starting to look like you're dressing drag queens."

"Listen, Tim, as long as you see Chinese drag queens walking down the runway, I'm good."

Since Tim only had time for coffee in San Francisco, he flew east for a good meal and a visit with Kelly Dempsey. 

It isn't possible to make Springfield, MA look more beautiful.

Project Runway had us fooled all season, thinking that Kelly was from BOSTON when she was actually from SPRINGFIELD. These are TWO DIFFERENT PLACES. They are nowhere near each other and even the accent is completely different. The coastal accent all the way up from Boston to Maine drops the R in CAR and puts it back in MARIA. So "Maree-er can't parallel pahk" is a sentence commonly heard in Boston or Portland. But when you travel west from Boston, the accent starts to become more like upstate New York. The Rs come back and they don't migrate to the end of words that end in A.

The collection appeared to be a flashback of Kelly's entire experience on Project Runway. Look...there's the brown vinyl fabric she used for the Bridge dress!  Sequins and sequinned fanny packs were all there.

"I made fanny packs!"

Bunim-Murray, I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID WITH TIM GUNN TO MAKE HIM GUSH OVER FANNY PACKS LIKE HE DID!!!!

Fanny packs? I've got a fanny pack that looks just like that...and it was ok IN 1990. I'm over them now and I'm pretty sure the rest of America is, too.

But I get it. It's your signature. Your thing. They gave you $9,000 and seven weeks, the very least you could do in exchange is make a fanny pack that doesn't look exactly like a fanny pack that I could buy at Dollar Tree.

Her inspiration was 1970's Studio 54. 

I think I liked it better when her inspiration was Wu-Tang Clan. Seriously. She didn't need to travel back in time to bring something fresh to the runway. I think her quest for glamour distracted her from what's going on all around her right now. The pieces she showed Tim looked like cheap designs made out of expensive textiles.

She also continued her practice of combining materials to form custom textile finishes.

The piping, metallic ribbon and sequins combine to look like the sort of fabric you'd use for outfits on a parade float.

And did she really need to spend hours sewing piping together? 

Tim was excited about what he saw and encouraged Kelly to do more. I would have sat her down and given her the same pep talk he gave Candice. This looks like she is still in the "I need to make cheap materials look good" mindset. This is the mindset of someone who can only afford one yard of expensive fabric and must make it stretch over an entire garment. This is someone who hunts for bargain bin trim notions so that she can build them up to use in place of more expensive materials.

It's edgy when you use zippers as trim, because they have a unique texture and it's an instance of seeing the beauty in something utilitarian. I would have prefered her to use more "hardware" as trim instead of combining trim and fabric to make embellished fabric.

That way, the show becomes a statement of seeing the beauty and glamour in the everyday rather than trying to bring glamour to the street.

But really, the studio visit was not what we wanted to see. The dinner with the family was nice, but that's not what we wanted to see, either.

In fact, there were chatroom denizens on their sickbeds who were slapping themselves to keep awake just to see this....

Expect next time you visit Bob's Italian Food on Billings Rd. in Medford, MA, to see a sign in the front window "HOME OF PROJECT RUNWAY'S KELLY DEMPSEY." 

"What? You didn't think I was going to take Tim to the deli? All he ever talked about was how hard it was to get good Italian deli in Manhattan anymore. I said, 'Ya gotta come to Massachusetts.'" 

While I peruse the olives and capers, could you slice some prosciutto for me? Also, maybe a half pound of mortatella, while you're at it. 

Even better than that...was this.

They named a sangwich after Tim Gunn!  And if you grew up around Italian Americans, you know a sangwich when you see one.  A sandwich is something you can easily hold in one hand to eat. A SANGWICH requires two hands. Bob's sangwich refuses to close on the platter! 

But wait... I need to see that sandwich again. Bob calls it a "Milanese." A Milanese is traditionally a breaded meat dish made popular in Argentina by Italian immigrants. The breaded meat is often served in sandwich form.

This looked like a sandwich with some prosciutto, but maybe some breaded chicken is added to it. A visit to the WEBSITE confirmed it!  WARNING: do not click that link on an empty stomach!

They don't serve food on airlines anymore, so I bet that Milanese came in handy for Tim's last visit to the lovely city of 

A rare portrait without bumper to bumper traffic.

A fancy, tufted couch. Chandelier. Name on the wall. 16X24 framed pictures of models wearing your clothing. I expected Nene Leakes to walk in at any moment.

Tim wore pinstripes for this shakedown. He meant business! Edmond had gotten distracted with trying to create evening wear and day looks. His heart, however, was in evening wear. Tim told him to pursue that.

Really?  So we're just tossing the whole idea of a cohesive AND a broad collection right out the window. You do remember this was THE CRITICISM of Laura Bennett.

OH...KAY....

If I hear Nina say anything about range and "one note" I'm going to HULK SMASH my remote control! Don't make me do that!

I would have at least wanted to see the day collection to see if there were any strong pieces there. But NOOO. Instead, Tim told him to focus on evening, which meant he had tons of work to do before the runway show in two weeks.

Edmond's family

The family visit was very sweet and low key. Edmond has that same cool demeanor as his dad. Speaking of cool....

Kelly, this is what street glamour looked like in the 1970's. 

I don't know what you were doing in the 70's, but whatever it was, it wasn't as fabulous as what they were doing. Clearly.

The home visits were heartwarming and insightful. The studio visits left me a bit concerned about how good the final runway was going to be.

This episode also continued the tradition of the last few years of having the designers show three looks to the judges before the show. Plus, there was a twist involving another trip to Mood and asking the designers to produce another dress in a day.

"Sometimes, designers get their best piece from the last minute look."

NOT THIS YEAR, TIM. NOT THIS YEAR.

Not this year when Edmond brought not one, not two, but THREE LOOKS that still needed to be sewed together.

Not this year when Ashley had not been able to have a fitting with her plus-sized models.

Not this year when having blown out all their creativity in their collections, Kelly and Candice had nothing left to add with an additional piece.

No. All it did was WASTE A DAY BEFORE THE RUNWAY SHOW. Thanks, Project Runway. Thanks a lot.

If you had to do a twist, a good one would have been to ask each designer to make some pants. Now I know I haven't seen everything each designer brought in its entirety. Even though the final runway pictures from Fashion Week are available online, I don't look at them until after the final show because I want to look at how they walked first. So I can't be 100% certain of this, but it really looks like we could have a runway show without a single pair of pants.

This ranks right up there with Anya Ayoung-Chee in Season 9 who's runway show had neither pants nor sleeves. I believe that was the year I screamed my way through an entire finale runway show.

"iNo mas pantalones!"

So really, all that's left is the drama of which three looks to show. Everyone showed their "last minute" piece. And it looked like most everyone showed their weakest or most controversial pieces.

Edmond Newton

He got a little too ruffle-happy with his collection. Everyone was disappointed that the pieces weren't more sexy. He needed more a balance between the sexy and the sosphisticated. Nina asked which one was the one-day piece. Trick question with Edmond because while the one closest to him was designed and sewn in a day, the other two garments were also sewn in a day as well because he brought them to New York in pieces. I'm pretty sure you can measure his sewing speed in "ruffles per minute."

Kelly Dempsey

As expected, her one-day look added nothing to the collection. Nina went on and on about how there was nothing special here. These are clothes you can find anywhere. As for the fanny packs, if you plan to use them, they need to be styled more strategically. I would have told her to ditch them back in Springfield. But I'm not a mentor or a fashion editor. I'm just a blogger. What do I know? I still have the two I bought back in 1989.

True story....I have an aqua blue fanny pack into which I've stuffed an American flag. It hangs respectfully in my front closet--ready for any protest, march or event that calls for a portable American flag. I can strap the pack on and I'm ready to be an American, anywhere, at any time. My son and I carried it at the 50th Anniversary of the March on Washington in DC last year. We got to meet all the dignitaries because they wanted to pose in front of it.

But if you're trying to update the street glamour of Studio 54 for a Wu-Tang generation, maybe lose the nylon strap, at least?

Ashley Tipton

The judges zeroed in on the issues with the fit.

This should come as no surprise to the judges and if I had been Ashley, I would have delivered an epic rant.

In fashion, there is something called a "sample size." For most designers, a "sample size" is between 0-4. I probably would not have been able to fit in a sample size after the age of 16 and I have never really been what you would consider to be "overweight." Most women aren't sample sized. Sample size is something for the convenience of the designer.

So while all the other designers could target a narrow sample size range (construct to 4, tailor down as needed,) Ashley needed to prepare for possible size 16-18 models. Some of her models were 12-14, hence the fit issues, which were more noticeable.

I know these critiques are edited, but I'm thinking the editors wouldn't drop off critical issues that would come up later in the final judging. I think think of three right away weren't addressed as adequately as I would have liked.

1. The cropped bustier. Now, I'm not going to criticize a plus-sized designer for offering a midriff exposing option. That model's got a two-pack and can probably hold side planks for 10 minutes without any wobble. My issue is with the design of the top itself. It looks too much like a bra and doesn't give her the support she's going to need underneath the bust. Namely, even when fit, any vigorous activity like...say...dancing is going to cause the top to ride up in the front. That is not what you want in a garment. It could use a couple of inches of banding underneath.

2. Quilted fabric. Why would you ADD BULK to a plus-sized woman? Why would you gather a skirt in quilted fabric? For what purpose? You've just added inches to the waistline and you've removed any spin or movement in the skirt. I'm not just speaking to Ashley here. Have you been shopping for clothes lately? Everything looks upholstered. Maybe designers realize how dangerous the world is out there and believe their precious customers need to be protected with packing material.

3. The sheer lace with exposed undies. When they look back on the first two decades of fashion in the 21st century, decades from now, they will remember the exposed underwear...when ladies chose to wear underwear.  The sheer over something is so overdone.  So Ashley went there with the purple dress. Nina and Zac discussed how the open back exposed the bra but there was no discussion about how the entire garment exposed what was underneath. Perhaps there's a degree of acceptance of this that wasn't there a few seasons ago. I'm eager to see how Ashley will resolve this. She had intended to make custom undergarments for the dress, so it will be interesting to see the final result.

The controversial part is whether or not this should be an offering for plus-sized women. In a day and age of ladies like Lena Dunham and half the cast of Orange is the New Black, women are demanding more variety. Dunham, in particular, has been wearing and styling designer clothes quite questionably in the eyes of most fashion critics. Perhaps we are reading her completely wrong. It isn't that she doesn't know how to wear designer clothes. I think Dunham is trying to communicate that designers aren't addressing the issues of her body to give her the choice to push her own personal style envelope. She pushes it anyway and the result, in my opinion, is more of an indictment of their designs than it is her style of wearing them.

News flash: WE ALL HAVE THIS PROBLEM.

When I go into a store, by and large, I am a size 10. When I order a designer garment online (which I have done a time or two) I am a size 12. When I order something from Europe, I need to add two inches to my bustline in order to ensure that the waist fits. After two kids, my bust to waist ratio is a lot closer than it used to be.

I AM NOT A FREAK!!!! I was just in a fashion show three weeks ago. Who are the people in this industry to label me as "ANYTHING-SIZED?" It is 2015. We have designer chemo that targets cancers based on their DNA. You can order computers, cars, houses, all sorts of things to your customized tastes and needs. Some of the fastest growing fast food chains are designed around the custom-built order.

So why are we subject to the tyranny of such arbitrary sizing?

I have a friend with a tiny waist and a wide hips. She cannot find a pair of jeans. AT ALL. I have another friend of mine who tearfully admitted that one of the reasons she doesn't exercise is that she can't find well-fitting, supportive exercise clothes in her plus-size. AND SHOULDN'T THERE BE EXERCISE CLOTHES IN A PLUS SIZE? 

I spent an entire winter sin pantelones myself because I couldn't find a pair that didn't make me look like stuffed sausage somewhere between my waist and crotch. You should have been with me two summers ago when I tried to find shorts. Speaking of shorts, my 5'6" husband hasn't been able to find shorts that don't go past his knees for close to 20 years now!

Let's say what needs to be said. WE ARE SLAVES. Women and men are slaves to a fashion industry that does not give a rat's ass about how we look.

Tim Gunn, himself, this year has stuffed himself into more suits that strain uncomfortably around his middle and under his arms.  This isn't about gaining weight. He can afford to buy new suits every year--and he does because his lapels are stylishly narrow.  This is about the styling. Bill Maher, Jimmy Fallon and Jimmy Kimmel have the same problem. Everyone looks stuffed.

Has fabric become so expensive that we cannot afford to make a garment that fits even people for whom money is no object?

So there stands Ashley, wrapped in a crazy skirt, railing against tyranny like Frida Kahlo. And like Frida, she has flowers in her hair because even crazy women want to look pretty, even if their bodies don't quite fit some arbitrary ideal.

And that is MY epic rant.

Candice Cuoco

"I was inspired by China."

"You are not Alexander McQueen. You need to be Candice Cuoco."

Ouch! I felt that one way over here in the cheap seats. I need to sit down and put my head between my legs for a minute.

Listen, Nina is right. Those three looks are a hot mess. They're a set-up to a joke. A post-apocalyptic dominatrix, a goth Holly Golightly, and a streetwalker who just stole a bunch of clothes from Vivienne Westwood's shop walk into a bar... 

Candice clearly needs to edit. Hopefully, she doesn't edit all of the interest and potential her collection had. We'll see. She, out of all of them, was the hardest for me to pin down. Her vision is fanciful and extravagant. Yet, translating that into fashion buckets is very difficult. What is "evening wear?" What is "day wear?" It's almost as if Candice should be designing for the stage. She always seems to be pursuing the drama in her clothes. Maybe she's overshot her technical capabilities. Maybe she had too many ideas at once. It's hard to know. We've seen tantalizing glimpses that hint at something completely showstopping. Does she ever get to that place? We'll certainly see next week.

Because I know a recap of a 120 minute show is not enough for you, I'm also including two bonus posts.  Six designers showed at fashion week. Two of them were decoys. I'm critiquing them all. Because there were only six, I'm running through all the designs.

Take a moment and visit my pages on Swapnil Shinde's show and Merline Labissiere's show.

This will provide an interesting contrast to the finalist runway shows to come.

Until next episode...join us in the Blogging Project Runway chatroom next Thursday at 9 pm Eastern Time for fun and camaraderie during the final show!